In the glove, apparently

"Where is it?!"

Mark with my glove and the result of his shot.

After getting thoroughly shellacked in a game where I played some of the best (and some of the worst) goalie of my life, a few of my team members hung around for a while to take some extra shots.

Mark took a slapshot from about 100 feet away. I felt like I got my glove on it, but there was no rebound, and my glove was empty. I felt some weird pressure on the top of my hand, turned it over, and found it. What's most impressive is the orientation of the thing...it must have been moving rather quickly.

Mid afternoon mind dump

Miscellany:

• My team won its most recent floor hockey game 8-3. Considering that I only stopped 3 shots, you should be able to determine my team's talent level pretty easily. From my perspective, this game was a disappointing step backward in my development. I say very few shots, and seemed to be out of position with alarming frequency. I had one good scramble that included a Hasek roll, but I wasn't square to the puck (ball), and I allowed two terrible goals, one five hole, and one under my left arm. It's frustrating, particularly since I know the problem is that I don't really see the puck, so my reaction is always based on fiction and physics, not reality. The next step, aside from more playing time, is learning to stare at the puck as it's being shot. Easier said than done.
• The Kings are struggling, but missing the playoffs is still a difficult task. I'll feel better if they win tonight, and much better once they clinch a spot. It will be the first time since high school that the Kings will be playing meaningful hockey come my birthday. Jon Quick is, lamentably, poor. He needs a rest, and Bernier is the answer. Unfortunately, the Kings are all too willing to sacrifice this season for the next, something I don't think is particularly reasonable.
  
• I just finished Nick Hornby's "Fever Pitch," after seeing Ben read it in Italy, and found it depressingly accurate. It is surprisingly difficult to explain the feelings associated with being a devoted fan of any team, particularly when said team is bad, or worse, merely underachieving. Go Huskies.
• I'd be more confident about the upcoming Angels season if not for their terrible spring training. Yeah yeah, spring training stats don't mean anything, but the Angels were great last year, and had a great spring training. I love small sample sizes, even though they're wrong, because they're comforting and scary.
• If it ever stops raining in Boston, tennis season is just around the corner.
  

This is my nightmare

Click for bigger version.

While my hockey career has been short, I've watched enough to know where I should, generally, be. That is, I know that my goal is to try and stay in or near the blue area, and though I'm an incompetent skater, I know where I should be, even if I can't get there.

My biggest fear is what happened to Jon Quick during tonight's game against Phoenix. He had to slide to his left to make a save, and as he slid out of the crease, Kings defenseman Matt Greene slid into him and sent the poor guy into the boards. For the next 3 or 4 seconds, Quick was trying to get up and make it back into the crease as the puck made its way around the back of the net and into dangerous territory.

I know this will happen to me someday.

Scary.

Jered Weaver is probably a decent goalie

Angels 4, Tampa Bay 3

I didn't catch this game, like, at all, so I was pleasantly surprised to see a win (and a Rangers loss). Goodness, Weaver is pitching well. 4 walks in 6 innings, which isn't great, but he only gave up 2 runs, a deficit the Angels "offense" is occasionally capable of overcoming. Of course, they led the whole game, so that's irrelevant.

Jeff Mathis is not good at baseball and shouldn't ever play.

Also, the seventh inning:

- D. Oliver relieved J. Weaver
- J. Dillon hit for R. Brignac
- J. Dillon hit by pitch
- B.J. Upton flied out to deep center
- C. Crawford hit by pitch, J. Dillon to second
- J. Dillon to third, C. Crawford to second on wild pitch
- E. Longoria intentionally walked
- C. Pena lined into double play, E. Longoria out at first

Um...yeah.


Lakers 104, Orlando 108

The Magic won by 4 points despite shooting a ridiculous 63%. Kobe missed 5 free throws and had a critical final possession turnover (again). You'd think they'd call a timeout when Gasol is lying on the ground clutching the ball...but you'd be wrong.

I'd be more concerned if not for the unlikelihoods that won this game for the Magic. The Lakers need to win one in Orlando and win the title at home and I won't whine. I still say Lakers in 6.


Jeff's Team 4, The Force 8? 9?

By far our best game, and by far my best game. We actually led 4-3 at one point in the second, but a couple softies and a couple nice shots ended that pretty quickly. Before the game, Jeff hit me right in the crotch on a shot behind me, which probably ended up helping. I've been playing like a hockey goalie...that is to say, I've been on my feet and dropped for shots. That hasn't really been working, and after writhing on the ground a little, I decided I wasn't gonna risk it again and stayed dropped down for most of the game.

Surprisingly effective, for the most part. I felt a little more comfortable with the pads from a lower position, and overall it just felt a lot more like broomball, which I am less terrible at. This strategy works better at preventing the crappy five-hole goals and tight angle shots, like those off faceoffs, but really sucks at defending a breakaway. I only bit hard at a deke once though, which was nice.

In other news, I have absolutely no use for my glove. I might as well just play with that arm tied behind my back, for all the good it does. I'll have to learn how to use it, because all it did today was deflect a single shot into the net and cover up anything on the ground.

I also seem to play better when I'm talking, which seems to be well in line with the rest of my life.

Here's a shot of my most raised stance. Without skates/ice, it's hard to drop down, so generally won't come up higher than this. I'm typically using a goalie stick as well, which puts my blocker in a better position, but this was a surreptitious photo on an illegal cell phone camera after the game.

A frightening scowl, indeed.

...and this picture below is a representation of my typical net coverage. Note the floating glove and the puck in the back of the net.
I give goalies a lot of crap for five-hole goals, but they are surprisingly difficult to defend. My employer currently owes me about 8 grand, some of which could go to goalie pants/jock, a helmet, and real chest protector, all of which are pointless at the floor/roller level but kinda important when you hit the ice.


Miscellany:

• The Pens won 2-1, forcing the Cup Finals to a decisive 7th game. Interesting note: The Red Wings have never played a Game 7 in the Finals in the years they've won.
• Should the Pens win, I'm going to petition Brad Thiessen to bring the Cup to Matthews Arena on the day he gets it. I figure maybe the guilt of his leaving would let me touch the Cup here at NU.
  
• I still can't get this bike out of my head. Belt drive! Apparently they're also near impossible to get. Trek makes a cheaper, 8 speed model as well. It'd probably look nearly as good if you replaced the rims with yellow/neon green deep vees, and maybe some matching handlebar grips.
  
• Tomorrow, MLB draft discussion, and a recap of my desire to strangle Jeff Boras with Manny's dreadlocks.
  
• If any of you read this on Facebook, do me a favor and leave a comment...my traffic figures are already at least one person higher than I thought.
  

...

Discuss.

Also, I am unbelievably bad at goalie. Next game's tomorrow.

Lakers, but first...

I'm gonna go watch the Lakers at Whiskey's downtown, but before I left, I felt it important to bestow upon my reader(s) my most recent purchase.

$50 and they don't even smell like dead cats, although it's still too early to tell. Blocker and glove were purchased new and are in the mail tomorrow. Oh man...when did this happen?

Tomorrow: Lakers recap and Angels discussion.

Angels, Lakers win, I'm a sieve

Continuing a theme from last night with the title here.

Angels 6, Seattle 5

The improbability preventing Matt Palmer's regression wore off tonight, as Palmer looked hittable (and was). He gave up 5 runs, three via the long ball, and generally struggled with his control, walking three to just two strikeouts.

Luckily for Palmer, he picked up his 5th win anyway, joining Jered Weaver and Bo Belinsky as the only Angels to start their Halo careers 5-0. Palmer got lots of help from "King" Felix Hernandez, who continues to exemplify the million dollar arm-ten cent head pitcher principle. The guy has some of the best offspeed pitches in the game, so he throws lots of fastballs, gives up 11 hits and 6 runs in 5.2, and manages to walk 3 players from a wildly hacking team.

Of course, Hernandez wasn't helped much by his crappy infield defense, with Jose Lopez booting an easy double play ball and allowing a run to score. Yuniesky Betancourt had an error last night as well. The vaunted Seattle defense looks...less vaunted, with Lopez/Betancourt and Skillet Branyan at first. I am unimpressed. Cedeno played today for Betancourt and launched a homer while playing better defense, so we should probably expect to see Yuniesky in the field for tomorrow's game. Hey, it's Seattle.

Anyways, the Angels got 4 innings out of the bullpen, with Jason Bulger allowing an inherited leadoff double to score, but otherwise looking surprisingly dominant along with Scot Shields and Brian Fuentes, with Fuentes striking out the side. The Halos look for a series victory tomorrow with Ervin Santana pitching against Chris Jakubauskas, who sucks and will thus shut out the "potent" Angel lineup. Game's at 7:10 Pacific.


Lakers 105, Denver 103

Before I continue, this needs to be said: I could not give any less of a fuck about Kobe vs. LeBron unless the Lakers actually play the Cavs. The Yahoo Sports comment boards are full of idiots, and I might have to switch to ESPN if they can't get a handle on the rampant idiocy.

I missed most of the first half, courtesy of my hockey commitment, and it's probably a good thing. Los Angeles came out flat in the first quarter, as they seemingly always do, but pulled ahead once Carmelo Anthony cooled down a bit and they remembered that half the game is defense.

The Lakers managed to win the game with timely defense and Kobe Bryant free throws. It ain't sexy, but it's a win, and I'll take it. Pau Gasol missing critical free throws was not funny, cute, or endearing in any crazy Spanish way. Also, you shouldn't be hoisting up 25 threes a game. They're lucky to have made the 11 they did.

Sasha Vujacic is not to be allowed near the three point arc until next season, and maybe not even then.

If the Lakers lose a series to a team with this dumbass, I might have to quit the NBA. Seriously, that guy looks like every 13-year old wanted to in 1997. I wonder if he gets called for a foul if he spears someone with that "hair." Somebody hide that man's Mega Ultra Hold gel.


Jeff's Team 2, Other Team 9 (two periods)

My first time strapping on the pads was enjoyable but forgettable from a performance standpoint. I was way too jacked up before the game, and after the first goal I don't think I spent a second thinking about positioning. By the fifth goal (second period) I was a mental mess, and it showed. I wasn't seeing the ball and definitely wasn't positioning properly, and it didn't help that the other team literally ran the ridiculous backdoor play that always kills Northeastern at least 15 times.

Jeff netted a pair and just missed a third which would've killed the stupid mercy rule. Seriously, if I wanted to play two periods of hockey, I would've signed up for two periods. The team looked substantially better, but our defense is still a speed bump when it needs to be a funnel. I saw at least 5 shots from players in the slot, either on breakaways or free runs across the ice.

On the bright side, there's lots of room for improvement. My best saves were early on, shots that hit me in the chest because I was ready for them. I've also started getting used to wearing full goalie gear, which is nice, particularly since this is something I'd like to do both in college as well as after college. I struggled a bit with movement (I really miss being able to slide on ice), but that should become more natural as I gain some playing time. Anyone with a cheap set of leg pads, let me know.

Also, I now understand something. I used to laugh at Shaq as he walked to the free throw line, literally pouring sweat from his head and face, all that liquid getting into his eyes and soaking his jersey. I didn't get it, I don't really sweat, and besides, he'd been on the court what, five minutes?

Well, I definitely get it now. With a t-shirt, chest protector/shoulder pads, elbow pads, cupped compression shorts, shorts, long socks, leg pads, a catcher, a blocker, a jersey, and a shitty goalie helmet, you get HOT. Fast. Within five minutes I had already begun to feel the sweat leaking down my back. Just awful.

Next game's a while from now.

Lackey pitches, I get injured

Angels 10, Seattle 6

The Angels offense is a lot like the Lakers: better outside Texas. The Halos managed to beat Jarrod Washburn who, outside the Angels, is pitching completely out of his mind. After a series where they managed to hit like two extra base hits the whole three games, they came back with 4 doubles and 3 homers as the power behind their 15 hits. Kendry Morales is the proud owner of two of the home runs, earning 3 RBI and helping me forget about Mark Teixeira.

Torii Hunter had a couple spectacular plays in the outfield. He seems to save the nice catches for Seattle, with two tonight to add to the game-saving over-the-wall catch on Richie Sexson (?!) last year. The name Sexson conjured images of a Mariners team not entirely composed of scrubs, but then again, maybe that's really what the '07-'08 Mariners were.

John Lackey looked mediocre, about what you'd expect from a guy making a rehab start. My only problem with his start was the RBI base hit he gave up to Ken Griffey Jr. in the fifth. He had two out, Ichiro at second, and a 3-2 count, and continued shaking off Napoli before throwing a very hittable fastball. Griffey is an overpaid singles hitter...try and avoid throwing him a fastball.

At one point, Lakcey and Napoli got crossed up, with Lackey throwing a slider instead of a fastball, which thoroughly confused Naps. The entire process was sorta neat, though, in that Napoli started tracking the ball up and away only to have to drop his glove and move inside to catch the slider. It was a cool example of a typical hitting approach, which is sitting on the fastball and adjusting to an offspeed pitch, and something you don't really get to see that often in a way which makes it so clear.

I refuse to admit that Russ Branyan is a good player, and his failed pickle play (in which he dropped a ball trying to tag a picked-off Chone Figgins) didn't prove contrary to my beliefs. That said, the guy can hit, and I'd prefer that the Angels start treating him like a power hitter and throw soft and away.


Jeff's Team 0, Other Team 8 (two periods)

Floor hockey, my newest attempt at becoming an athlete through intramural co-ed sports. The mercy rule was 7 goals after two, so we only played a pair of periods.

Jeff suited up as goalie, and actually had a reasonably good game. Outside one, maybe two goals, he got beat on tough shots. With a street hockey ball, shots tend to stay high so most of the goals tend to hit the top of the net on their way in. We have another game tonight where I'll be in net, so I'm looking at more of a stand-up style than my usual butterfly as an attempt to cover more of the top of the net.

I played forward last night, at least for the most part, and actually really enjoyed myself. Stick checks are legal, so I was having a good time with that, and taking faceoffs was pretty entertaining. I also managed to get launched over the barrier and into the scorer's table at one point, and took a couple sticks to the knees and feet, both of which are now really sore. It's also a lot harder to slide on plastic tile than it is on ice, so the outside of both of my knees are pretty torn up. I have newfound respect for hockey players who accumulate 30 minutes of ice time in real games, as I was pretty gassed after 2 minute shifts. I'm looking forward to relaxing in net.